Kids are your shadows - Guide them properly

Today, it took me nearly 1 hour to brush my son's teeth. He went all around the house dancing and kept mocking me. But at one point, I became so tired and got angry when he accidentally pushed all the items (paste, brushes) from the shelf. I spanked him. He immediately shouted, cried and raised his hand to spank me back. Though I promised myself not to spank or emotionally hurt my son in anyways, sometimes I break it when things go beyond my crucial point of patience.


When my son raised his hand, though my parental proud got wounded, I realized the truth behind it. What you sow, you will reap it. Not only this incident, many times it happened that my son shouts aloud at me and try to beat me. Even for small matters like not want to have milk, he shouts at an unbearable decibels saying “Amma I don’t want to drink milk”. This is because, once I had that bad habit (I must admit and I feel shame about it) of shouting and spanking him for his mistakes. Though I overcame those depressed days long before, the after effect is still seen precisely. He never does this to his father.

When he commit’s a mistake, even if I politely ask him “Monu, what did you do?”, he shouts and cries in anger to answer my question. But if the same question is asked by his dad, he will hug his neck and with poor innocent tears, he will tell “No accha, I didn’t do that. I tried to keep it proper and it fall accidentally”. I well deserved this, isn’t it?

I got to watch this video recently. How true it is. Kids follow what we say and do. We are the role model to them. They pick everything from us. They learn it from us. I hope my son will forget those short time, I been a bad example to him and learns good things from this new mother.






The original Post - Author, myself

Why this little monsters always have unanswerable questions?

Today is definitely not my day (or should I say my son's day?). I went to pick my son from school and the teacher told that he wastes snacks served. She said, "He thinks that it is a must to eat all the items in his snacks box. So he bites everything, but couldn't finish. We tried to tell him that instead of biting and wasting, he can leave the packet unopened and untouched, but he is not able to understand. So try to explain him in your own language".

My son is not familiar with English yet, so sometimes he cannot understand the teacher's instruction. So, they seek my help to convey messages to him. Today, teaching him "Not to waste his snacks" was my homework. So, when we started walking out of his school, I started my preaching which continued for 20 mins (I was not scolding or forcing. But in a casual way I tried to say that he don't need to take the snacks if not wanted and should not waste food items). He was so quite listening. Finally I asked "What did amma told you so far?" and the little rascal asked me back "oh amma did you say anything? No you were not saying anything". I was shocked and said "I should give you nicely". He smiled and said "OK". So when I pretended as if going to pull his ears, he said "amma amma, you asked me not to waste snacks, ok, ok?".

Man, 3.3 years is certainly not an age to make such a fun, isn't it? OK, the real show started later. He asked for a banana when I entered a shop to buy a tamil magazine. Later when we got into the tram, he peeled the banana and started eating. After half done, he said don't want it. I started the preaching again. "This is what amma said so far. You should not waste your food items. Else Kutti Krishnan (which means baby Krishnan - his favorite GOD) will not like you and won't talk to you". There started my trouble.

He slowly turned left and right and asked me, "Where is he here in this tram? He is in the temple (Guruvayoor he tried to mean). He is not in this tram and so he won't know that I wasted this". Really I felt astonished with his thinking. I replied him "No monu, GOD is everywhere. He hides and watches you all the time". The quick reply was "I didn't see him in the shop where we bought the banana. If he hides there, that shop uncle will catch him and give to police". OK, now I am holding the hand bar in the tram strongly, not to faint. Because, it was me, once told him that the shop uncle will hand over the mischevious kids to police if they run or hide in the shop, when he and his friend tried to play "Hide and Seek" in that same shop. Now I should be more careful in replying. So I said, "GOD travels above in the sky and watches". GOD, you tested me again with a question from him "No, I saw only smokes (clouds) when we fly in the flight and I didn't see GOD". Times Up. Need a break. So I changed the topic from GOD to muscle.

Monu loves his dad's arms with muscles (as he do exercises regularly) and always says that he is a big boy and he too is getting muscles. So whenever he makes fuss to eat, I used to tell "OK then you won't get muscles like your dad" and he finishes the food. So I took that concept and said "If you don't eat the banana fully, you won't get muscles". But he was not ready to come out of the GOD topic and so he asked "Amma, if I eat banana, then I will grow and get muscle. But kutti Krishnan is still small. Why?". OK, I understood. Today is definitely not my day. I know why this question came. When we went to Guruvayoor, we offered lots of bananas to the temple and when my son asked for a banana from that, we said it was for Kutti Krishnan and so will buy something else for him.

Now, he remembers that and wondered why kutti Krishnan is still kutti (small), though after having that whoelsome banana bunches. What should I tell? If I say, eating banana is not going to help kutti Krishnan to grow big, then the banana in his hand also will go to the bin. If I say kutti Krishnan have grown big, then he may ask for proofs. I was really mad and GOD felt "OK times up stupid gal" and gave me a phone call. I took the opportunity and started talking in the phone. Monu started staring out through the window and slowly biting the rest of the banana. He didn't continue his questions after the phone call. May be bored?

Now, I am holding my breath expecting the question session to start at any moment.